"Through the Circle of a Year, Until All Times"
is the second book from my history:
"From animals, people, plants and EVERYTHING that grows, learns and thrives"
Things continue to be exciting for Hermes, Marie, Rose and many others.
A year full of challenges, new encounters and explorations takes its course and at the winter solstice everyone gets their measure full of life, abundance and tasks,
As a reminder, here is the last episode againen from: "HERR DOG and THE GIRL", recognizes Mr. Hund's abilities and his knowledge of the healing power of plants in the rose. She gives him the name HERMES in his honor, the name of the initiate and father of the Hermetic teaching Hermes Trismegistus. So he is finally no longer nameless and a recognized member of the community.
The overturned hump
The following days were simply wonderful. Mrs. Sun once again swung her golden hair vigorously over the land to give the apples and berries the final sweet touch and to say goodbye to all those who loved her during the cold days and hoped to see them again soon miss.
So the time had come when sie sent their plant protégés, who had worked diligently all year, back to the sheltering bosom of the earth, for the next year again slept well, sprouting out of it fresh and lively and doing their work for the benefit of all.
Herr Hund, Lilly, Schnuggel and Schroeder were in unity dozing, light entertainment and here and there, one is amazed, playing and hunting in an unprecedented unity. Marie plowed blackberries and rose apples and pears.
Suddenly there was a little scream from the orchard. Everyone jumped up and ran toward the scream. Rose was sitting in the grass, the hump she had been standing on to reach the top branches of the trees was tipped over beside her. Schnuggel and Schröder hugged the injured Rose lovingly, Lilly licked the leg that Rose kept clasping and moaning in pain, and Marie ran into the house to get the emergency kit.
Mr. Dog, meanwhile, checked the situation in a concentrated and calm manner, saw the leg, scanned the exact location of the injury, looked into Rose's eyes and ran. Everyone present looked at him in amazement, especially Lilly, who growled angrily: "What an impertinence! Bad time to go to visit his girlfriends.” In no time Mr. Dog was back, covered in dirt from head to toe and powerroot stuck in his snout, carefully placing the plant, which had been dug up and rooted, on Rose's injured leg. He sat down in front of Rose, looked deep into her eyes and telepathed: "You have to take the root. Rub it on your ankle and you'll soon have a good leg again."
Rose could hardly believe her eyes: "That's not possible." At that moment, Marie also reached the scene of the accident and knelt down to comfort Rose and to hand her the things that were needed from the box. Rose took the plant from her leg and looked at her and Mr Dog alternately.
"Yes, exactly, my dear! Comfrey, I would have taken that now too. My goodness, thank you!” and started laughing out loud. Everyone was irritated except Mr. Hund, who was happy. Rose scooted over to Mr Dog, took his front paws, lifted them up and placed him in a levade like a proud horse does.
“HERMES, you are an initiate, knower and healer. That's what you should be called! The name does you justice.” Mr. Dog – now Hermes was bursting with pride and joy, stood on two legs without holding Rose, let out a strong howl (the agrimony would have turned green with envy) and Mrs. Sun beamed at Hermes, Rose, Marie , Lilly, Schnuggel, Schröder, Power Wurz, the upset hump and the orchard with a full strand of hair kept for special moments.
"Through the circle of a year
until all times"
The Episodes
Rhythmic drumbeats and a strange song woke Marie from a short, dreamless, but deep sleep. The drum struck both high and low tones, not loud but so intense that they vibrated through the walls of Marie's little room. She put her hands over her face and felt the slight dull ache in her head. But her body was awake and that usual tingling that called for action forced her to get up. She was curious as always and wanted to know what was going on.
Rose prepares a dish that smells delicious as always in the kitchen and Jacob trims the fruit trees in the garden.
"Marie, are you up again? The drums must have woken you up. I can ask Jacob if you can stay at his place. You'll have a little more peace there."
"No, no, I'm fine. I fell asleep. What's nice? I'm really hungry.” Marie murmured, sniffed the stove and leaned lovingly on Rose, who was standing at the sideboard covered with bottles, containers and herbal bags and was preparing a medicine.
“Nettle spinach with tomato and yam. Mama Mambo brought the yams. You will definitely taste good. Herb and cinnamon bread and a huge cheesecake with chocolate dots are still in the oven. Mama loves sweets very much and so do you, Mariechen."
"Hmm, how delicious. Rose you tell me everything. I'm a little confused you know. You leave in the middle of the night and then you come back with a voodoo priestess. I've never seen you so troubled as you were last night."
Rose took Marie's hand and walked her to the table. She sat down, pulled Marie onto the chair next to her and took both of her hands.
"I have to apologize to you. It wasn't easy for me to leave you here with this poor guy. I wasn't even sure if he would make it through the night and putting you through that still haunts me. But I had to act. It was clear after his suicide attempt and the ordeal in the forest that he was in bad shape. The body had to deal with so much poison and his soul with the situation. But at some point I had a very strong feeling that there was something else behind it. I perceived things that I had once seen and felt during an exorcism on my teaching trip to Africa. There were unspeakable things presenting themselves within him and around him that were cold and cruel in nature and suddenly Mama Mambo appeared in my mind's eye and smiled at me.
And I had the strong feeling that I had no time to lose. Please forgive me but I had to trust you with this responsibility. And I wasn't wrong about you. You got him through the night.”
Rose gently stroked Marie's forehead and her eyes were full of pride, love and tears. "Good work, my Marie!" She quickly turned to the stove. “So and now help me set the table. We are four today.”
Shimmering vortices in the air and a strong step announced Mama Mambo's appearance in the kitchen. "Yummy, yummy Mama Rose! What beautiful things did you conjure up there again?” Jacob was also nasally hypnotized by the scent that came from the kitchen and stood in the kitchen door, beaming with joy.
Despite all the circumstances, it was a cheerful meal. The whole kitchen was filled with Mama Mambo's joy and rustic cheerfulness. Marie had to put up with a few well-intentioned but strong cheek pinches and slowly got used to the strange and strong vibrations that Mama Mambo was so redistributing.
The main meal was plastered and everyone was looking forward to the warm cheesecake.
"Marie, now you tell Erzulie what happened last night."
Marie obeyed and fetched the piece of paper from her room with the times of the patient's sleep and cramp phases. Rose and Mama Mambo were amazed.
"That's good and helps us a lot. Now tell everything.”
Marie talked about the course of the cramps and how they became a little shorter towards morning. That she had washed and anointed him, as Rose had shown her, and that she had sung all night, partly because she was afraid.
Mama Mambo listened. "What were you singing?"
"Oh, I mostly just hummed to myself or sang "At the fountain in front of the gate", "Joy, beautiful spark of the gods" and the healing mantra Om mani padme hum."
Rose and Mama Mambo shared a knowing smile.
"Have healing voice little birdie." Mama Mambo Marie considered along with a nose pinch.
Rose wanted to know if the man was awake, what he was doing and if he had said anything. In the meantime, she had found out from a hospital card that she found in his jacket that his name was Darius Schön, that he was a doctor and worked in the psychiatric clinic of the Charitas Hospital in Hamburg.
Concentrated, Marie narrowed her eyes to remember exactly and told. "Yes, he woke up four times and he fantasized in his sleep. He spoke in different languages. One of them sounded like English only very wasted. Then he spoke Spanish, Arabic and a language I had never heard before. He fantasized and said how glad he was that we finally found each other and that we made a promise at Stonehaven that we would find each other again and love each other forever." Marie blushed a little at this point and would love to have this episode not told. But her sense of duty would not allow her to be left out. Maybe it could be relevant. She continued: "It's in Scotland. I checked tonight. He must be mistaking me for someone. That was probably the delirium.”
Again, Rose and Mama Mambo exchanged knowing looks.
Mama Mambo summed it up: “Now Mama Mambo understands. Two things got into him. Curse and Marie. I saw it but couldn't place it. You are wife of husband.”
"What am I? No, Mama Mambo! I don't even know the man and I've never been to Scotland. I just found him in the woods. So actually Hermes found him. I swear I've never seen the man before."
"Not here, but earlier. Be connected by red ribbon. be a soul Now Mama can see Mambo. So much fog around him. you saved him Mama Mambo does the rest. Evil magic, dirty work!” Mama Mambo spat contemptuously on the floor.
"Wasn't a Bocor, otherwise a man would be dead. But he was someone who got bad advice. Is someone who knows him well. Is a woman but still someone in the background. Found another spell. Old Love Spells. Didn't work because man has strong will and character. Woman wants him badly, wants power over him. Is obsession. Has a bad head. But it's hard to find. Has good camouflage. Is respected, has position and power over others. Has many weak beings in her power. Are weak and dependent.”
"But if he's so strong-willed, why did he try to kill himself?" Marie legitimately wanted to know.
"Part of dirty work. If you don't want to bloody fingers yourself, let people do it themselves. Say yes, very bad magic. Even strong beings are sometimes weak. Then magic can work. Erzulie is already doing that and Mama Mambo is now looking forward to cake. And later Mama Mambo Marie cleans up. Got some dirt because soul mate enchants. I see in your aura. Bitch wants to kill you too. Is jealous. It's not that bad. Erzulie likes Marie and helps.”
Marie dropped the fork with the cheesecake she had picked up. She gaped at Rose for help.
"Don't worry Marie and don't be afraid. Because fears are what give such magic power. I see these dark energies around you too, but the spell is fading. Please trust Marie and believe in your strength more than ever.”
Marie felt in and around her and yes, now she noticed it too. The slight pain in her upper arm was encased in something dark. She visualized it like claws grabbing at her. And then that dull ache in my temples. She saw something similar to suction cups importing and exporting at the same time. Through the small kitchen window she could see a piece of heaven and gaze deeply into infinity, as she always did when she didn't understand. And infinity looked back at little Marie, who sat confused at a kitchen table in a small house by the big pond, and inspired her with deep trust and a small piece of understanding of what Rose called the all and whole, which boundlessly with itself nothingness and a complete emptiness. 'Yes', thought Marie: 'everything is really there. I'm beginning to understand. And what I experience always contains everything, both one and the other, tests me and always gives me the choice to decide and learn from it.'
"No I am not afraid. How am I supposed to understand something if I haven't experienced it myself?”, she said more to herself but still loudly into the kitchen, took a piece of cake and went out the kitchen door.
It was only just before the sun ended its grandiose spectacle here and moved on to an audience on the other side of the world that it came in through the very same kitchen door. Rose looked at her and paused for a moment. She looked at the door frame and Marie who was standing under it and said with a smile: "Marie, I think you've grown."
Two unforgettable days and nights moved into the natural coolness of the Nordic country. Heated and ecstatic drumbeats and chants, fires that burned day and night and ancient rituals born of the scorching heat of the African sun and the spirit of a distant culture filled the place. Everyone seemed to be listening intently and curiously.
Long conversations and exchanges of ideas satisfied Marie's endless curiosity. The strange smells of herbs and elixirs when Mama cooked or cured Mambo were instructive challenges to her senses.
However, what exactly happened behind the door of the hospital room remained Mama Mambo's secret. She told only as much as ethics as a priestess of voodoo permitted. The knowledge about the rituals was not described in any book, it was passed on from generation to generation.
Marie particularly liked the completely undogmatic views, which also allowed mixing deities and rituals from other cultures with those of voodoo. Loa Erzulie, for example, was written like the Mother of God in Christianity. In this way, the subjugated and enslaved Africans had the opportunity to continue to worship their deities during Christianization and to live their cult, albeit limited. The Christian conquerors simply could not do anything about it when the Africans worshiped Mother Mary as Erzulie personified. 'Actually a clever move', thought Marie and continued to listen to Mama Mambo's stories.
Mama Mambo mostly worked with Loa Erzulie, who she let go to heal and pass on divinations to those seeking advice. Here, too, Marie experienced that possession, as it was despised and feared in the culture of western peoples, punished as a blasphemous act or diagnosed as an illness, can also be seen as a useful tool in a positive perspective. And that this was the case could be seen from the rapid improvement in the patient's condition.
Although Marie did not attend the actual healing ceremonies, on the second day of the treatment she saw him walking in the garden with Mama Mambo and Rose or sitting on a bench. However, she herself avoided him and tried to avoid him. A strange feeling came over her every time she watched him, and Mama Mambo's conclusions about their incarnate relationship unsettled her.
She really didn't think so. She took with her from Mama Mambo's reports and tales what she could represent for herself with her own point of view, just as she did with Rose's tales about the rough nights. And she didn't want to do it at all! Certainly most women her age were already engaged, married and had children. For her, this topic was never so much in the foreground. She had enough to do with herself or had been more concerned with surviving her respective life situations in the past. Yes, she had the odd romantic daydream in which she imagined being loved by someone. She also imagined what this man would be like now, how he looked and what kind of life he would have, which she then shared with him at the end of this daydream.
One thing was clear to her, a damn suicide who was also a doctor and, if that wasn't enough, a shrink, none of these ideas came even remotely close.
On the one hand, she had absolutely no desire to fear for the life of a suicidal husband and, on the other hand, she didn't like doctors. She had also had bad and very painful experiences with this guild in the past, the consequences of which she still suffered from and one of these “white gods” had even put her life in danger with his work. For her there was no doubt at all. Mama Mambo must have been wrong or was trying to set her up with her client in some rather strange way. Maybe it was her way, because it was pretty clear from what Mama Mambo had told her that she was pretty casual about love affairs. Ecstatic unions, sex and physicality peppered the stories of their life and culture.
Mama Mambo said something and Marie blushed or bit her fingernails in embarrassment, which made Mama Mambo ecstatic and encouraged her to go into more detail about certain things. She teased Marie with certain innuendos about her "pointy breasts" and perky bottom. Laughing, she offered Marie a love spell to remind the man lying in the sickbed even more of her and to strengthen the already existing bond.
Then it was time...
Marie started bubbling like a witch's cauldron and one of the ingredients in the cauldron was obviously done and this ingredient was called anger. With a vocal power she had never tried before, she hissed at Mama Mambo and rose at the same time. "Now I've had enough! I don't know the man, I don't want to meet him, and I don't want a goddamn love spell either! If at some point someone should fall in love with me, they should kindly do so on their own. And I don't want to hear any more of that crap from now on. No offense Mama Mambo, but this is just taking me too far. I don't believe that and I won't let you or any spell from any distant culture persuade me to believe that. And stop grinning so mischievously, Rose! You're both getting on my nerves, you lascivious old witches!” This was followed by an angry scream, a stomping on the floor and the slamming of the room door.
Find the right wrong words
or
The wrong right words...
Mama Mambo was gone. Your work was done. Little by little, her pulsating energy left the molecules of everyone and everything, which she had charged to the brim, and made her way leisurely home to her master.
Marie gave this pulsation to the garden, swept away old leaves and plucked the beds here and there. She was still angry and preferred to work alone.
"Hello, Marie" she heard a clear, deep and very masculine voice from a considerable distance but strangely enough close by. She paused, leaned on her broom, and turned to greet them. "Hello, you seem to be up. How are you doing?"
"Better." The man coughed in embarrassment and his nervous look revealed that he was searching for the right words. "I haven't had the chance to introduce myself yet. My name is Darius.”
"Pleasant," Marie replied a little more harshly than planned. "Well, you already know my name."
"Yes, you told me the other night."
Marie was startled. "Can you remember that night? It seemed to me that they were, well, in completely different spheres.”
Darius didn't answer right away. He seemed to be thinking. He did so, among other things about whether he should continue to address her in the first and very special way, or how Marie should use the formal Sie form of address. He decided to stick with you. "I don't remember much. I only saw you every now and then and heard you tell me your name."
"It's better that way." Marie continued sweeping.
"I wanted to thank you. Rose told me a few things and said that you found me and that you took good care of me."
"Don't thank me. Thank you Hermes!" growled Marie, because again the foaming ingredient Wut was simmering in her stomach and reported: "I'm done!" other spice and distributed its aroma, because Marie felt her eyes fill with tears. Of course, she didn't want to reveal this to her counterpart at all costs, turned around and swung the broom.
"Marie, I've noticed that you're avoiding me and I can tell from your reaction that this incident is, shall we say, very distressing to you. I assume that you have suffered a post-traumatic stress disorder, which you are now trying to compensate for by rejecting me as a person. If you want, we can talk about it.”
Frozen into a pillar, Marie stood in the position of the moment with her broom raised. The tears in her eyes froze to ice in a matter of seconds. The rigidity broke in a flash, she threw down the broom, turned around and was very close to Darius in no time at all, who had obviously recovered very quickly and wanted to resume his work as a psychiatrist.
She was now eye to eye with him and between them stood Marie's outstretched index finger with an imaginary extended and razor-sharp claw at the tip. It almost touched Darius' nose, but only almost.
"I'm Marie and not her patient and I don't have postdingsda abandonment trauma. What do they think of anyway? I ripped my ass off and as you can see my skin too, to find her out there in the woods and keep her alive. I just lost my precious herb book there because of her. That was my most precious possession and it was sacred to me. I strongly recommend that you consult a colleague so that you don't end up lying around half dead again soon, instead of accusing me of a disturbance or something else."
“I said post-traumatic stress disorder, not trauma induced by abandonment. Interesting! Maybe something is speaking from your subconscious?”
"You're a stupid ass!" Index finger and invisible claw were retracted, Marie took a step back, looked at Doctor Darius Schön with an all or nothing saying look from top to bottom and then walked away.
"I recommend iodine for the injured skin," Darius called after Marie, who was leaving.
"Yarrow, that's where the yarrow helps. As a doctor, you should know that.” And away was the herbal witch student Marie Gabe.
Rose tended and watered the young plants in the garden shed, which were soon grown enough to be planted in the ground. Without regret, she couldn't help but overhear the conversation, smiling and humming softly to herself. She tried to focus on the sprout to control her mischievous thoughts and a giggle that was already in her throat. Darius heard her humming and paid her a visit.
"Hello Rose! Oh these are beautiful plants and so many.” He cleared his throat and tried to make an impression of being “in charge”. "Yes, so Marie is..." here he paused briefly and thought about suitable words. Rose noticed that, of course, and quickly helped him out of trouble.
"I know Darius. She's lovely.” The below-the-throat shackled giggle finally defeated its suppressor and burst out of her blatantly.
"Yes, exactly." Darius admitted and scratched the back of his head in embarrassment.
From the burden of the torch that illuminates the darkness
Marie tossed and turned in bed and beat her pillow. In another part of the house, Rose, Jacob and Darius were comfortably sitting at dinner. Until late at night they talked about experiences and the latest scientific findings on the one hand and on the one hand on traditional and traditional methods from the healing arts. Rose was enthusiastic about new techniques and procedures in medicine and Darius, on the other hand, was very open-minded and interested in old healing methods. However, he was particularly impressed by Rose's profound knowledge of the healing powers of plants and assured her that she would definitely try one or the other.
He envisioned the future and saw the opportunity to offer his patients an alternative with Rose's support. He was only too aware that many of the medications he gave them helped, but also had many side effects that the patients then had to suffer from as well. He pondered the possibility of combining both chemical preparations and natural remedies derived from plants, or even substituting one or the other medicine with herbal preparations.
But suddenly he went quiet, his forehead creased and he looked worried.
"Are you all right, Darius?" Jacob asked, placing his wine glass on the table and leaning towards Darius in a friendly manner.
"Oh it's all good. I just had a little trouble at work. There were a few inconsistencies that I noticed. I got into an argument with the chief doctor about this. He's actually a friend of mine and gave me the opportunity for this position as senior physician. Basically, I'm too young for this. But he trusted me and supported me from the start like a kind of mentor.”
"Can or do you want to talk about your worries?" Rose joined the conversation, noticing something strange around Darius. She lit the candles Mama Mambo had left for her to clean the house and also put some herbs in the warmer on the fireplace.
"Oh, I do not know. Maybe it's nothing. I've lost a few patient files and noticed that some patients suddenly had their medication switched or their doses changed. This is also the case with some of my patients, although I am of the opinion that the medication I prescribed corresponded to the clinical picture much better and had a more targeted effect on the symptoms. The day before I left here, my boss came with the missing files and said he accidentally put them in his files. Looking through it, I found that data sheets were missing and entries I had made had been altered. It was about the length of stays, the course of illness and my prescriptions and doses of medication. I confronted him and he sent me on vacation and said I was overworked. I can not explain it. Maybe he was right, but I know what I ordered and documented and can remember one or the other patient exactly. And something else is strange. With such severe clinical pictures, it is actually normal for the patients to come back, sometimes after a longer and sometimes a shorter time. But lately some patients come back relatively soon after discharge and mostly with a much more pronounced symptomatology than in the past. Well I don't want to paint the devil on the wall. Maybe or very likely, otherwise I wouldn't have ended up with you under these circumstances, I'm really overextended and overworked, but as far as my memory is concerned, I'm very sure of myself. I have a special memory about certain things.”
"Is there anyone else you told about these inconsistencies?" Rose now wanted to know.
“Yes, I spoke to my colleague about one or the other. I've known her since I was a specialist, we've been working together for a number of years and I trust her. I asked her how her patients were coping with the new medication and whether she had noticed any abnormalities. I didn't want to involve her in more. You must know she is very devoted to me if you understand. I try not to let too much personal familiarity flow into our work processes. She paid me a visit once. But I can't answer that. I mean that I have no feelings for her. We spoke about it at the time and she accepts that.”
"And what did she answer you? Have you noticed similar things?” Rose asked further and tried to make sense of Darius' stories.
"She said she hadn't noticed anything out of the ordinary, didn't know anything and thought the new drugs were acceptable. However, she assured me that she would pay attention to this in the future and give me feedback if necessary.”
It was now beginning to dawn on Rose. However, this lightening twilight caused her great concern regarding the darkness that had brought Darius here. She left the conversation for some fresh air. Deep in thought and drawing conclusions from Darius' report, she took a cigarette from the small box on the dresser and went out into the garden. Taking a deep breath, she looked up at the star-studded sky and thought. How should she explain to Darius the danger she suspected he was in? Apparently, his boss and friend was well paid by a drug manufacturer for the administration of his drugs. His colleague was obviously obsessively in love with him and seemed to stop at nothing to either have him or destroy him. As for Rose, it's quite obvious that Mama Mambo was a lot more than right about the term "sick head" and she was probably dealing with a psychopathic personality. Rose also had the suspicion that Darius' colleague knew very well about the fraudulent machinations of her superiors, perhaps was involved in order to collect money for her silence. The fact that Darius was on to the whole thing could be the reason for her efforts to get rid of him using black magic and would be an explanation for these powerful and destructive practices that she had used or had used on him. She recalled Mama Mambo's words: "Woman really wants him, wants power over him. Has a bad head. But it's hard to find. Has good camouflage. Has many weak beings in her power. Are weak and dependent.”
Darius mostly didn't even notice Mama Mambo's actions. He was either asleep or fantasizing.
He smiled at the symbols painted with vegetable paint on his body, but was open and polite in conversations with Mama Mambo. How could a scientist be expected to believe that energetic influence had made him so ill, a curse weakened him and he was doomed to die. He had to make a sacred promise to Mama Mambo to listen to her, contrary to his scientifically influenced attitude, and to always wear the sacred amulets she gave him around his neck.Rose was hopeful and guessed Darius would wear the amulets out of respect and gratitude so as not to hurt Mama Mambo. This noblesse and politeness would perhaps save him from the worst in this case.
Should Rose bother Darius with her suspicions, or spare him, hoping that he found the truth himself and was strong enough to accept it? At the moment she simply couldn't assess whether she should interfere in the course of events and whether she should interfere with Darius' fulfillment of his inner tasks and bring about a conflict. Rose decided to go within that night and discuss this with her spirits. She looked at the starry sky and thought lovingly of two wonderful beings. Because with everything that Mama Mambo had prophesied about Darius and Marie's fate, they definitely had one thing in common, this kind and loving innocence.
The next day everything was back to normal. Darius was gone and Marie was hoping for the familiar habit. She was tired of the excitement, strangeness and drama of the last few days and wished for the peaceful and contemplative everyday life that she and Rose had lived here before. Rose was exhausted too and you could see that the last few days had taken their toll on her. Not much was said. Rose sewed herbal bags and spent half the day in the herbal chamber. Marie couldn't motivate herself to do anything and played with the puppies. She didn't even want to take her usual walks with Hermes. She hardly left the house, let alone the property. The outside world seemed uninviting to her at the moment and she had no desire for it, as was her habit before all events, to rediscover it every day. On the one hand she was afraid of renewed excitement and on the other hand she mourned the loss of her beloved herb book. She had searched the entire area around Darius' location several times. But the book was gone and will probably be gone forever. Sure, there were other books, and hers wasn't a one-off either. She mourned the beautiful moment when Rose presented it to her. She mourned the joy and pride that this presentation brought her. She felt so honored and special then, like inducting Rose into the herbalist's guild.
A few days passed like that, quiet and contemplative, as she wished, but everything was different anyway. What made Marie happy was that Jacob stopped by more often now and Rose also visited him almost every day. Rose always declared that she only wanted to bring him bread or cake or anything else that she felt she had made too much of, but Marie felt it and was glad that there might be something else behind it.
"Good morning, Doctor Schön. How was your vacation?” the porter greeted.
"Good morning, thank you very much" Darius greeted politely.
As he passed through the gate, he breathed a sigh of relief. The familiar surroundings of his job promised him a certain security. The past few days have been too turbulent and again and again shreds of memories of the ordeal in the forest, wild nightmares, Marie's wide eyes, drums and Mama Mambo's chants, overwhelmed his mind and senses.
The day he left the witches' house and returned to Hamburg, he felt relieved and looking forward to his life. It was difficult for him to believe that the last few days really filled the pages of his life book and were not memories of a movie or a strange book. He couldn't understand how the mood that drove him into the forest came about. Sure, the last few years have not been happy ones. Both in his private life and in his work, where he was constantly faced with the task of having to assert himself against older and more experienced colleagues and to prove his authority. This often cost him precious energy and time, which he would rather devote to his patients, but did that make him unstable and suicidal?
When he got off the train in Hamburg, the strange events at a safe distance, he paused for a moment on the bustling platform. People rushed in all directions, bumped into him and sought their destination. Darius looked up at the station's huge vault and for a moment wasn't sure if the vault was protecting or imprisoning him. The feeling of "finally being home again" just didn't want to come up. In spite of all the many people who darted back and forth here, he suddenly felt infinitely lonely and empty. He went home, opened the door to his apartment and found nothing here but silence and solitude. There was still a half-full bottle of whiskey on the shelf in the kitchen. He took the bottle, filled a glass and drank it down. The feeling of loneliness and an unclassifiable fear finally retreated behind a fog. He leaned against the hard and cold leather arm of his sofa and tried to relax.
The following nights were merciless and gave him no sleep. He tossed and turned. Every time he was on the verge of sleep, the memories would catch up with him and call out loud. "Look!"
But now he opened the door to his office and was sure that his patients and the unfinished work would distract him and that the everyday routine of a hospital day not only guaranteed his patients a certain stability, but also him. But his office, his desk, the bookshelves, the sink and everything else suddenly seemed strange to him. He couldn't explain it, but for a moment he could have sworn he had never set foot in this room. The door opened without anyone knocking and Karola, his colleague, stood in the frame. She seemed surprised and looked at Darius, who was reading the letters, in amazement. She said quickly. "Darius, you're here." Darius looked at her calmly and something inside him told him that she didn't seem to have expected his return.
"Yes I am. Such a holiday seems to come to an end faster than it should, not only for the holiday maker. You didn't seem to have expected me. Karola, I'd like you to knock first."
"Oh sure. You weren't there for a week, so I didn't need to knock beforehand”, she answered quickly with a very tense smile.
"What did you want in my absence in my office?" Darius wanted to know.
"Just a file. And now tell me. How were the days off?” Karola tried to steer the conversation in a different direction and fell into the chair in front of Darius' desk.
A very secure feeling in Darius caused him to tell the complete opposite of what had really happened and he felt the urge to touch his amulet. "Wonderful, really beautiful. I was visiting a friend in the country, a former classmate. Lots of fresh air, walks, yes, that felt really good.” Darius smiled and leaned back relaxed in his chair. His amulet slipped out of his shirt collar and something suddenly seemed very strange to Karola.
"What have you got there?" Karola asked and her gaze promised something strangely irritated.
"Oh an amulet. It was given to me.” Darius answered and quickly remembered Rose's last words. It almost seemed as if she were standing in front of him, the memory was so close. "Darius, if anyone notices your amulet, you're welcome to wear it visibly, be careful. Whoever it is and no matter how well you know them, don't trust them and don't let anyone touch them. I can't tell you more. You have to find the answers yourself." This is the echo of the imaginary rose.
Karola mesmerized the engraved mark on the amulet and leaned over to Darius and held out her hand.
"Can I see? That's really pretty. Who gave it to you?” Karola craved an answer and a touch.
"No, don't touch me, please! I had to promise. And as we all know, promises are kept. Not that the curse of voodoo will hit me," Darius joked playfully and skilfully and observed the reaction of his trusted colleague very closely. She slowly pulled her arm back without taking her eyes off the amulet, gave a fake laugh and stood up. "Oh, it's almost nine o'clock. The service meeting. I have to do something first. See you soon.” Karola said goodbye and closed the door behind her. Up close again, but this time right in his head he heard Rose's voice: "Well done!"
Darius picked up the phone, dialed the number that was on a small piece of paper in his wallet and waited for the dial tone. The other end was answered and a loud "Hello", booming knocking and a surge of fluttering energy reached Darius' ear and amulet, which immediately caused a tingling sensation on his skin.
"Hello Mama Mambo, this is Darius. i need to talk to them When are you free for me?”
"Love Much Stronger Than Voodoo"
Marie was in the garden planting seedlings exactly according to Rose's instructions when Rose called her from the kitchen. She stopped what she was doing and went to meet Rose, who was walking quickly towards her. They met at the little wooden bench under the apple tree where they had had so many long conversations. Here Marie Rose had confessed that she could not read or write properly and Marie had so often listened to Rose lovingly told stories and legends.
"A package has arrived for you". Rose handed Marie the thick envelope and they both sat down.
"For me? Who is sending me packages? I don't know anyone at all?” On the package was only her name and address written in beautiful handwriting. Curious, she opened the packaging tape and scratched the heavy paper with her fingernail. When she finally opened it and saw what was inside, a little scream came out of her. "My herb book!" she exclaimed loudly. The book seemed to have done a lot. The cover was faded and curled around the edges, and some pages were curled and slightly yellowed. But that didn't matter. Life is experience and it is well known that it also leaves traces and scars. Marie found a small letter stuck between the pages and excitedly opened it:
Dear Marie,
on the way from your house to the village one of my shoelaces got loose
solved. As I bent down I noticed something in the embankment, your book.
It says your name and you told me you lost it.
Unfortunately I didn't have time to return to you. I was in a hurry to get around
to catch my train.
The book was very wet and looked battered. I have it page by page
let dry and cleaned a bit. I hope you enjoy it nonetheless
to get back.
I really hope and wish that you will be able to get over the bad experiences
to process and forget my person.
I wish you all the best and say hello to you
darius
Marie gave Rose the letter to read, bit her lower lip and watched the passing clouds.
"That's very nice of Darius." Rose spoke softly and followed Marie's gaze. "Yes, it's very nice. Look Rose, that cloud up there that looks like a rabbit. Where do you think she is tonight, and who will see her and find that she looks like a hare?"
"Marie, you've been very quiet these past few days. Don't you want to share your thoughts with me?” Rose asked, putting her hand in Marie's lap.
"I don't know Rose. Something has changed. I feel like I want to do something. But I don't know what it is. My thoughts go in circles and always end up in the same place. I just do not get any further. Something is inside me and wants to get out, wants to go. But I just can't find the right key to open the door for him. It's like pressure and it hurts but I can't do anything about it because I can't locate it. It's alien to me and I can't see it even though it's inside me. Sometimes it's so strong and it hurts me.” Marie bowed her head and a tear smeared Darius' signature.
"Maybe it's time for you to go Marie. Sometimes a hike and other impressions break the circle in which one turns and from which one seems unable to find a way out. I know the feeling of stagnating and standing still. When I had such moments in my life, I tried to gather all my courage and just left these worn and trampled places. It's just a step Marie."
Marie let her tears flow freely. "Yes, I also have the feeling that I want to go but then again I don't. you are my home rose I have no one else in this world. The time here with you was the best in my life so far. I've never experienced so much good. I only became a real person because of you and I am alive. Before that I was just surviving. I just don't know what I want right now. But one thing I know, I never want to lose you."
Rose hugged the heap of misfortune next to her tightly. "You won't either. Whatever you do, wherever you are, I will always be with you. You only have to think of me and I'll be there. You know this works. And you don't have to go forever either. If you want, take a trip, short or long. Go today and come back tomorrow or in 10 years. This is always your home and as long as I live I will be there for you and beyond that probably too. I'll have a few thoughts. I know one or the other that you could stay with and from whom you might learn something other than what I can teach you. And of course you think too. Maybe you get an idea of where you are drawn to right now"
"Yes is good. Until we figure something out, I'll try to earn some money for the trip somewhere.” Marie sniffled.
"Oh, don't worry about it. I've got some savings, and by the way, you've got some money, too.” Marie frowned in disbelief. "I? Where should I get money from?”
Darius left a letter under the doormat with a check for a not inconsiderable amount. It said that he was very grateful for his rescue and care and that he wanted to show his gratitude for it. I sent the check to Mama Mambo and it came back today in the mail with this note. Today is your lucky day, Marie!" Rose reached into the pocket of her cardigan and gave Marie a small note.
“Not my wages, but Marie's. I just did a little cleaning and saw good friends. Love much stronger than voodoo!”
Marie is happy about onenice alternative to Christmas
On the morning of the winter solstice, Rose prepared a fire bowl in the medicinal plant garden and decorated it with fine herbs and candles. She hung ribbons, apples, sunflower blossoms and small bags of herbs from the branches of the trees. On the one hand for jewelry, on the other hand to offer hungry birds and ghosts something to eat. In the kitchen, humming softly, she prepared a delicious, cinnamon-scented dough. Marie came into the kitchen, took a cup of tea, sat down at the table and watched her with a smile. "Are you getting all that ready for Christmas?" she asked Rose. "Darling, I don't celebrate Christmas. I hope you're not disappointed. I celebrate the rough nights. Have you heard of that?” Marie said no, a little relieved that Rose, like her, didn't seem to be a Christmas fan.
It wasn't such a good time for them most of the time. None of the Christmas celebrations she had experienced remained pleasant in her memory. Most of the time she was alone or with people who didn't give her a sense of security, and these people's eager attempts to suppress their feelings and mutual dislikes while trying to make everything shine and shine on the outside only stressed and confused her.
"No, I've never heard of those nights. Please, tell me something about it”, she replied, visibly relieved. Rose sat down with Marie at the kitchen table with a cup of tea and told them about the long tradition of rough nights and the longest night of the year, the winter solstice. That at the end of this night and with the rising sun the light triumphs over the darkness, the days get longer again and a new light year begins. And that night was today!
Her ritual that night is to light a fire
ignite and those written on paper
Events and things they like to dismiss
would like to surrender to the fire and around
Protection and blessings for the coming year
to ask.
She would also like special herbs
the sage, mugwort and rosemary help
which they use to cleanse and clarify the
events additionally smoke. And today
be exactly that night! Then there would be
delicious bread on a stick and a punch.
The power of the light can then still be up
on December 24th, the first rough night,
strengthen. Namely, that night they open
have the gates to the other world and the spirits
for twelve nights out. They ride up
blustery breezes through the air, and
"People" do well to pause, to themselves
keep yourself and the house clean because dirt
Put on dirt and clean just pure.
And so the manifold spirits sought each otherjust the quality that best suits them.
Only when the listening twilight knocked on the small kitchen window and reminded Rose to kindle the fire did Rose interrupt herself, who, with shining eyes and her charming joke, talked about ghosts like Odin and Mother Holle and about the chance to look out for the to influence the fortunes of the coming year. She jumped up from her chair and called out: "Come on Marie, let's make a fire and take a piece of paper and a pen with you!"
Marie was enthusiastic, found one or the other a little creepy, but saw the rough nights as a nice alternative to Christmas frustration.
The fire crackled softly into the freezing cold night and from time to time gave her a little warm spark to keep her warm. Marie reflected and, as she was told, wrote down everything that she would like to say goodbye to peacefully this year and does not want to take with her into the next year, experiences and encounters that had bothered her, her own fears, thoughts and patterns in her behavior that she likes wants to redeem. Dick wrapped up in a blanket she wrote and wrote, remembered and remembered. Some she wrote with a trembling hand and some with tears in her eyes. But she noticed that just by writing them down, the thoughts and images moved away from her a little and stopped bothering her and taking her breath away.
"Punch?" Rose asked, holding out a fragrant and steaming cup to Marie.
Marie looked up and smiled gratefully at Rose for hitting the pause button on her memory projector. "I need more slips of paper," she laughed and took the handed cup.
"Your writing is going well, dear. Are you happy about it? You did it all by yourself. To you, Marie". Rose raised her cup and held it out to Marie to toast.
"No, to you Rose. Thank you for saving me and for letting me be with you.”
"Well then to us and to life," Rose Marie sang happily.
"Look Marie, you only know your story up to my garden gate. On the other side of the gate there is also a story, mine. You say Hermes brought you here, maybe not just to save you, but me too. I've been doing what I do for a very long time. A serious illness brought me to the plants and stones and to this beautiful place. The doctors gave up on me at the time and so did everyone else. I myself had no more hope and my situation forced me to my knees and pushed me to the ground. And there on the ground, in the dusty asphalt, I suddenly saw it, a tiny little daisy, sticking its head through a crack in the asphalt. I thought I was going insane when I suddenly heard a small, bright voice proudly calling out to me: “Ha, I did it. I made it Hello there, can you see me? Yay, I finally made it.” Yes, I saw it and I don't know how long I knelt and cried in front of this little flower, stroked its delicate white leaves and shared my joy and congratulations. People walked by and some laughed at me, mocked me: "The old woman is gaga, completely crazy" and things like that. And suddenly I saw things differently, or let's say I finally noticed them. I looked up, the sun was shining, a warm breeze caressed my face, birds were singing, the air was pulsing like a heartbeat. Everything pulsated and vibrated, the leaves on the trees, the grass on the meadow, bursting with life and love.
'I can do that too', I thought to myself and so this tiny little flower was my healing and from there I got involved with the plants, got to know them and traveled around to learn from women who knew their healing powers well. One thing led to another. I learned about ancient traditions, astronomy, the healing stones and mysticism. My spirit was so hungry and I finally understood why I got so sick. He starved in my earlier life, where I cared about what other people thought of me and I only because of my position and my environment, which only shone with money and expensive things and houses and constantly wanted to outdo each other. I became so free and healthy with every new plant I discovered and with every good line I left. At some point people started asking me for advice and since then I've been helping those who come to me as best I can with advice and action. That's one part of my work, the other might still be difficult for you to understand, Marie. But there is a balance to be kept in this world and for that there is a network of initiates, knowers and healers around the globe. Some of them are people with a high level of understanding and access to the spiritual world. That requires a great deal of responsibility and most of the time these people have a very difficult path to walk. This is the so-called purification and a test of their consciousness. So I finally understood my way. However, times are very difficult and the zeitgeist is hostile to life and many of us have fallen through wars. The last year was a very difficult one for me and many others and I began to have doubts, lost confidence due to all the bad things around me and in this world. You know Marie, I have tried to help so many people and at one point I was out of strength and there was no one to help me and I had locked myself into the network whose key is infinite trust. I locked all doors, visible and invisible. Schnuggel and Schröder became more or less self-sufficient and hunted mice. I just managed to get Lilly something to eat and stock up on enough wine and cognac for myself. Then the day came when I couldn't do it anymore either and I asked Josef to take Lilly with him for a few days and told him I wanted to "travel".
Rose looked deep into Marie's eyes and said, "Yes, I wanted to 'go away' and then there was a bark at my garden gate, Marie."
Marie put the cup in the snow, knelt in front of Rose, hugged her and wrapped her blanket in addition, like a dove that protects her little ones under her little wings and pressed herself tightly to her. With all the care, the mutual respect, Rose and Marie had never hugged. Marie had too much respect and felt that Rose wouldn't like it or that she might not like it. But now she couldn't help it and lo and behold, Rose was happy to let it happen. Marie looked Rose in the eye and said, "Now I understand. Now I know what you meant when you gave Hermes his name and told him he was an initiate. He saved us both. This is amazing. So they do exist, these spirits and this network that you spoke of, that are not just people, but also animals and plants and what else do I know.”
Marie told Rose about the voice she heard as they came out of the clearing and she was so terrified and desperate because she didn't know where to go, forward or back.
"Yes my dear, that's how it is and most of us only experience it in great need and it's your decision whether to trust it or not. You always have a choice and in the course of life you always get the chance if you have made a different decision. We are all human and everyone comes at a very weak moment and is unable to have even a tiny bit of hope and then there are others, no matter what shape, green, two or four legged, a flicker of the candle . If we just let it, we'll never be alone and without help, Marie. If I had sent you both away then, what would have happened? In any case, the two of us wouldn't be sitting here in the snow on a freezing cold night, I wouldn't have cold feet and you wouldn't have an icicle on your nose. Man, is that cold. Come on love let's move a little and then we'll redeem the past in fire. They both got up and Rose added a few more logs to fuel the fire. Marie jumped and rubbed to thaw herself. Then she was hit by the first snowball thrown treacherously, cowardly from behind. She cried out briefly, the bullet was still hanging on her shoulder. Slowly she turned and looked the attacker deep in the eyes, without taking her eyes off the target, she grabbed the missile on her shoulder and fired it back with lightning speed. The battle was on and not only warmed up the two opponents but also made a lot of fun...
Lovelyhanding out Christmas Presents
Nervous and worried, Hermes paced up and down in the room in front of the door to the herbal chamber. Marie wanted to stay with him, but was by now a bundle of nerves due to his restless pattering and heard the clicking of his paws on the floorboards even without her being in the room.
Thoughts and images raced between Hermes' ears and he tried to piece together how it all happened.
The day Hermes saved Rose and gave him his name changed everything.
Schnuggel thanked him in front of Lilly and Schröder with one, "No offense Hermes. You're a good one!”, which meant that his position in the house had now changed and he was finally no longer the one tolerated but a full member of the community. Schroeder showed him respect by letting him go first when they went into the house. Well and Lilly...
Lilly was actually the same as always. Only occasionally did she amaze Hermes by teasing him, mimicking him and his endearing absent-mindedness and occasional clumsiness, teasing him but also making him laugh. Sometimes even stupid things developed into subtle and profound conversations. Hermes was enchanted by Lilly's charming and clever spirit. She inspired his thoughts and gave him a mental boost here and there. His feelings for her changed. He wasn't just in love with her. He was enchanted in love.
They went for a walk together at the pond and sniffed together through little adventures, some of which they staged themselves, or some that actually happened.
After one of those adventures, chasing a cunning little shrew who seemed to be taunting them, yelling at them from one direction and then another: “You can't get me. Here I am and already I'm gone again”, they rested together on the bank of the pond.
Lilly snorted exhaustedly, but smiled at the same time: "Ah, I have to rest for a moment. Such a cheeky bitch. But it was fun. You almost got her over there on the corner.”
"Yes, but just because you circled her, she almost jumped in my muzzle."
Both smiled...
"Would you like me to lick your paws?" Hermes offered magnanimously.
"No, no, that's fine, thanks. But if you could nibble my neck a bit? That would be nice. That always relaxes me a lot.”.
Gentleman Hermes positioned himself supple and gallant on Lilly's back and very carefully began to massage Lilly's neck with sharp teeth. Soft and supple, he slowly worked his way through her soft fur, down to her soft skin, finding something no one had ever found before, namely Lilly's "good spot".
If this were a cinematic work and nothing, black and white, the camera would now pan gently in some other direction, into the vastness of nature, for example, or into a beautiful sunset...
So, and now Hermes, whose nerves one could have played the violin on, was pacing up and down the room, thinking. Lilly has been strange the past few days. Asked him, if politely enough, to leave her alone and just said, "It's almost time. I feel that."
"WHAT is up? Lilly talk to me. Are you angry with me. Did I do something wrong?"
"No, everything's fine." Lilly puffed and went to her newly furnished quarters in the herbal chamber, from which she had already promptly complimented Hermes twice with a venomous growl.
Finally the door opened and Rose, the only one who allowed Lilly access, came out of the little room with shining eyes and a beaming smile and called out happily to Hermes: "Happy birthday my dear, what a sweet gift!"
Hermes didn't quite understand and tilted his head a little to the side to be able to think better and looked at the closed door to the herb chamber. Marie was excited too, knelt down next to the confused Hermes, petted his smoking head and questioned Rose.
Both ran ecstatically around the little room and drank one witch's water after the other." So there are three. Oh how nice and is Lilly doing well. Oh, I want to see her so much. But yes, I know Rose. Let's leave Lilly alone for a while and recover."
Hermes stood in front of the two happy and lightly tipped women and tried to understand. "Ah, three then. Understand. No, I don't, but Lilly is fine. That's the main thing.' Hermes woofed to interrupt the squeaking and chattering of the ladies. "Could someone please enlighten me. Hello, helloho, I'm down here."
Rose leaned down and cuddled Hermes and Marie kissed him on the nose and the chatter continued.
'Women, they're all slowly but surely killing me! Well, you can't get anything out of them. I have to get out of here. Maybe I'll find Schnuggel. It's a cat, but at least a male,' Hermes mumbled to himself and went into the garden.
Hermes was lucky or not. He found Schnuggel in the garden shed.
"Snuggle, nice to see you. Finally a normal here. Tell me, do you know what's up with Lilly? I haven't seen her for two days and before that she was very dismissive and didn't want to talk to me. And the ladies in there are acting very oddly. Do you know what's going on here?"
Snuggle abruptly stopped grooming his paws and claws and stared at Hermes with open mouth and huge eyes.
"Boy, you didn't really ask me that, did you? That can only be a joke.“, Schnuggel wondered, amazed.
"Why?" Hermes asked, close to despair. "What's going on here? Nobody tells me anything."
Snuggle stood up, grinned shamelessly at Hermes, began to chuckle, to giggle and then his constancy, which actually never left him, left him. He stood on the planting platform, spluttered, pointed at Hermes with his sharp claw and started laughing out loud. "You idiot, that can't be true. Do you know what's going on with Lilly, he asks me. I just don't believe that.” He alternately slapped his paws on the wood he was sitting on or hid his eyes behind them and finally started spinning in circles, catching his cock in delight.
Hermes stood speechless and with his mouth open in front of the crazy cat. Carefully and slowly he started walking backwards and silently moving as best he could in the direction of the exit. He didn't want to upset the cat any more. 'Apparently they've all just gone mad here. Must be the weather. Just keep calm. I'll find out what's going on here.'
Rose and Marie had finally left the room to prepare for their ceremony. Hermes crept to the door of the herbal room. He had already studied the mechanism of doorknobs extensively. It couldn't be that difficult. So he stood on his hind legs and tried to push down the latch with his front paws. It took a little but lo and behold, after two or three attempts, it clicked and the door opened. He quietly crept through the narrow gap and tried to get used to the darkness in the room so as not to bump into anything. It smelled beguilingly of herbs and plants. Slowly he found his way between the shelves, jars and chests, but there was no sign of Lilly.
He plucked up courage, even at the risk of being kicked out again, and called her. "Huhu, Lilly, are you there? I'm sorry, I wanted to see you and I want to know how you are. Don't be angry, but the others don't tell me anything and I'm worried."
"Hello Hermes, I'm over here under the table," Lilly replied quietly.
"Can I come to you? I really just want to know if you're okay.” Hermes whispered hopefully to Lilly.
"Yes, come on." Lilly welcomed him.
Hermes padded around the room uncertainly. He didn't know his way around here very well.
Then he finally saw his love. With her back to him, she lay on her side and didn't move.
His heart was beating in his ears and he ran towards Lilly without paying attention to obstacles or trip hazards. "Oh Lilly, what about you? Can I help you... What, what's that?” Hermes focused his eyes and saw three tiny figures nipping at Lilly, cheerful and cheerful. "These are boys. Where did you get that from?” he shouted at her impetuously, confused and stunned. A question he would be ashamed of for the rest of his life every time Lilly teased him about it.
Lilly turned her head to the side and smiled lovingly into his wide eyes. At the same moment, behind Hermes' forehead, the memory film of the last two months unwound at breakneck speed. When the film ended abruptly on the day of the shrew hunt, his knees started shaking, his paws went numb and he fell over...
Marie's unmistakable"Exercises in Silence"
“Stop” was heard in the supposedly quiet room. With this stop, Rose interrupted Marie's thoughts that had become too loud.
"Damn," Marie scolded herself, close to frustration, with a limp leg but a very alert and talkative little head.
Her joy at the "beautiful" alternative to Christmas was almost gone and at that moment she would rather be somewhere alone in a dreary little room, with candlelight and sad thoughts. Just like some of her Christmases passed with hope for the next day when she could at least distract herself with work.
“Breathe deeply, breathe in and breathe out. Focus on your breathing swing, on and off.”
"Ok," Marie gasped, completely tense and seemingly powerless against the incredible flood of thoughts that were racing through her head.
'Where are all these thoughts coming from? Old, new or from somewhere else. A storm was raging in Marie's poor head. No, you could say a hurricane. That can not be that hard.' Now she understood why Rose said to her. "You probably can't do that yet. I don't want to persuade or force you. Rarely has something good and lasting emerged under pressure and coercion. We're not diamonds. These are its conditions to grow, prosper and shine. It's 12 days and you're untrained. I don't want you to have to give up in between and then get angry at yourself. But I appreciate your effort and interest.”
Marie knew Rose a little now and somehow she had the impression that Rose wanted to test or challenge her with these words and answered confidently and unaware of what was to come: "Yes, Rose, I would like to do these ceremonies with you and learn from you.” And now she was sitting cross-legged, muscles sore from last night's 108 prostrations and again unable to concentrate on her belly button “breathing swing” and her head full of thoughts that she seemed to be also mocked.
Marie: 'What is that? What makes me breathe?'
Marie's ego: 'Well me, what a stupid question.'
Marie: 'No, not you. You're just my ego, Rose said.'
Marie's ego: 'I'm bored. I want to do something different now. What's the point of sitting here and breathing. Pure waste of time.'
Marie stayed brave, concentrating on her breathing swing: 'What is that? I don't know it.'
Marie's ego: 'What is what?'
Marie: 'What makes me breathe?'
Marie's ego: 'It's me and if you do it again
want to ask who sowed your seed, it was
your parents.I want to get up now, my leg does
hurt andI'm hungry.'
"Shut up," Marie snapped at her ego, of course
she did it loudly into the room and got a fright
terrible about it. She squinted, embarrassed
over to Rose. "Excuse me!".
Rose was now out of her immersion in the
space returned,struck the little gong
and smiled Marieunderstanding.
"Marie, you are very brave. Look, you're doing this
already the third day and i have to say i
am really amazed and proud of you. Have patience.
It's really not a Zen Master from heaven yet
fallen as far as I know. It takes a while and it
requires regular practice, into stillness and emptiness
to find. I was then in the monastery of the
I told you, sat there just like you and
would have liked to run away screaming.
the sensesmastering and letting the mind flow is not an exercise that is learned quickly and especially not in this day and age when the click of the clock hand is given more importance than the heartbeat and breath that make life and our physical enable work. You're doing great and now come on let's eat something before your ego bitches again. After all, it has already tried very hard today to exercise moderation. Then you have to praise and reward them. It's not that easy at the moment," she added with a smile and, as always, bowed towards the window, towards the day, the light, the world and creation.
The days were getting lighter again and the light noticeably stole a tiny bit of time from the darkness on each new day. The snow that enveloped the land and the trees in their gentle sleep slowly pulled away its soft blanket to let what lay beneath it be gently tickled awake by the returning light and to awaken curiosity and a fresh drive for something new annual work.
Excited, Marie stormed into the kitchen with an almost squeaky voice, where Rose conjured up one of her delicious dishes and bought bread and cake at the same time.
"Rose, something is blooming! There, there is a bush blooming, bright yellow and there is still snow on the branches. I've seen it myself. That's impossible. It's only February."
Excited, wide-eyed and holding her broomstick, Marie looked at Rose, waiting for an explanation or the promise of a miracle.
Rose had to laugh. The sight of Marie was just too funny. "Marie, you're just lovely when you discover something new and it makes you so lovable. Watching you experience and experience everything like a miracle is really wonderful. And now, little witch, put the broom in the corner, otherwise it will fly away with you. I'm starting to consider that you could do it with your energy. The pots are shaking here.”
"Yes, but it's true. A bush full of strange flowers that look like hair or threads and they smell wonderful.”
"The witch hazel has awakened, Marie. It's the witch hazel. A representative of what they call Winter Task Force.”
"Witch Hazel? Winter Special Forces? Please explain that to me. Can she conjure up the witch hazel?”
"You know her already. But only in the form of my tinctures, oils and your special cream that helps you with the little pimples. Another name is witch hazel.”
"Is that the witch hazel? That's wonderful and how beautiful," exclaimed Marie, full of delight. "Come on Rose, let's watch it together and tell me everything about him or her. Actually, I like witch hazel better because of the name. And what do you mean by winter special forces? Come Rose!"
Rose, knowing she wasn't going to get away from it, patiently put the pot off the fire and put on her garden boots, smirking to herself and thinking, 'Yes, yes, nature is rushing into spring and so is Marie. Stravinsky's muse for his “Le Sacre du Printemps” was probably one of those Mariechens.'
As Rose, as commissioned, in the garden on
Witch Hazel appeared, waited
Marie there already impatient, however
Shape, color and scent of
studying wondrous florets, upon them.
"You prepare the tinctures and the ointments
from the blossoms to rose?”
"No, I'll use the fine twigs for that
and the leaves. I prepare from the flowers
a healing water with the distillery too. I am in love
the scent also very much and use
then use it as refreshing water.”
"Oh, that's great. please do me too
such a water? The scent issimply
wonderful."
"No, I won't!" Rose replied
with a played serious mine and entangled
poor.
Marie responded promptly and apologized
yourself immediately. "I know Rose. you have im
a lot of work right now. It's not that important."
"But it's so important! You want it and you shall have it but I would suggest you go it alone.”
With her mouth open and her eyes sparkling, Marie stuttered, "I'm supposed to do that. Alone. With your sacred still?”
Rose just winked and nodded. Marie hopped unchecked towards her, hugged her passionately and both almost faltered. "Thank you very much! Oh I'm so excited I promise you I'm very careful. I've seen you so many times."
Rose talked about the healing powers, origins and botanical characteristics of witch hazel and the plants that she described as a winter specialty, such as mistletoe, coltsfoot, ivy, winterlings or daisies, which either bear fruit in winter and thrive grow or stretch out their flower heads even in very cold and dark times. Rose ended with a little story.
"And something else makes the witch hazel very special, Marie. Imagine she can shoot. "I used to sit over there in the summer and read a book." Rose pointed to a patch of grass near the fruit trees. "That's quite a bit away from the magic bush. Now and then I heard a strange cracking noise, similar to a small bang. I was surprised and couldn't place it, but I didn't investigate the matter. The book was too exciting. Suddenly something hit me on the forehead and hit the pages of the open book. I picked it up and recognized two seeds. Then another bullet hit me. I looked up and, as if drawn from there, looked straight at the magic shrub and heard a small giggle coming from there. So I went over to ask why I was being shot at. Arriving at the bush, I heard a happy little voice. "Have a look! Bang!” At the same moment one of the fruits opened and just two seeds flew meters over the lawn. The plants like to show what they can do and especially to those who love and appreciate them. Just as the little bush proudly presented its first blossoms to you today, to your delight. Just like a little magic. And now come on, let's build the still together. You can do the rest all by yourself.”
A fateful day
or
How life weaves its way
Spring was here! Everywhere it lolled and stretched. The soil broke open and fresh shoots and leaves fought their way through the darkness to the warming light. The warm air flickered and the first brimstone butterflies danced in gentle breezes.
Marie also flickered and could hardly be stopped in her eagerness to admire and explore the freshly awakened nature. She often roamed through the forest and across the fragrant meadows after sunrise. Hermes accompanied her most of the time and was very happy to do so. His new fatherly duties, which he had unexpectedly imposed on him, had simply overwhelmed him at first and frightened him. He just didn't know what to do with these little things. A bit stumbling but always trying, he grew into his role as a father and Lilly helped him with loving advice when he didn't know what to do and was about to lose his nerve. Day by day, he earned more prestige and respect from his offspring, and was even admired by one of the three mini whirlwinds, who either delighted (all except Snuggles) or angered (Snuggles) the entire household. Herzchen, who owed his name to a heart-shaped pattern on his forehead, admired his father greatly and did everything he could to do as he did. Hermes was very proud of that. Although he would sometimes prefer to get rid of his little shadow, which followed him everywhere, he endured sweetheart's attachment patiently and with a lot of love in his heart.
That's another reason why the early walks with Marie were particularly valuable to him. Here he could just be Hermes, do things for himself and dwell on his thoughts and memories of the past. For example, the memory of how he woke up from his faint after discovering his “Christmas present”.
Lilly tried in vain to wake him up by calling softly. She couldn't do more, she was nursing the young and couldn't move. He jumped up in panic and howled at Lilly like crazy: "What are we supposed to do now?"
Lilly lay there relaxed and tried to calm him down with her tender voice. "Being parents. We should do that. You don't have to do anything. The little ones just want something from me. But you could help me. I want to stretch my legs for a moment. Can you lie down here for a moment and watch?”
"Yes, of course Lilly, but what should I do?" he panted nervously.
"Nothing at all! Just lie here and warm her up a bit.” Lilly instructed gently.
"Okay," he replied, completely insecure, and lay down on the blanket next to the boys. Lilly got up and stretched her slightly stiff legs. "Oh, that feels good!"
As soon as Lilly's warming body and food source had disappeared, the little ones became restless and squeaked softly. However, using their natural protective instincts, they quickly discovered the heat reservoir provided nearby, namely him - Papa Hermes. The little things immediately took the chance and crawled over to him.
"Lilly, help! Come back. They come to me and one of them tries to bite me.” Nothing from Lilly. She was already gone. He panted in panic and gasped. 'Keep calm old boy. You can do that. They're much smaller. Oh my goodness if I break one. Lilly is killing me. Lie still and don't move.', he howled excitedly to himself. So he remained, petrified like a sphinx, impatiently awaiting Lilly's return. Meanwhile the boys had made themselves comfortable in his soft fur. They also stopped fisting after they had unsuccessfully searched him for a source of flowing milk and slowly fell asleep. And he too slowly calmed down and his muscles relaxed. His fear of doing something wrong subsided. He felt the three small, warm bodies that had snuggled deep into his fur and noticed that it wasn't all that bad. He slowly turned his head and looked at the, more specifically his, sleeping boys. A strange feeling tingled and throbbed in the area of his heart and a deep warmth flowed through him and just like the day he was named his soul gave birth to him a deep pride and a feeling of wanting to embrace the world and he smiled a loving light on his boys and Lilly returning at this moment.
Yes, that's how it was back then on that exciting day.
Marie sat in the grass with her herb book, a shrine which Rose presented to her on January 6th at the end of the Rauhnächte as a gift and in recognition of her perseverance during the ceremonies, studying a blue-flowered sapling which she recognized as the prize of honor when she coming from afar, Hermes noticed a very excited barking.
She looked up worriedly. He seemed to be looking for her and there was something very serious about his shouting. As if unseen forces were rushing her to her feet, she jumped up and called Hermes to tell him her position. She saw him rushing out of the woods over an embankment, dropped everything and ran to meet him. She even left her sacred herbal book in the care of the honorary prize. Something was wrong. Waves of danger and need rushed into her belly, urging her to hurry.
Hermes saw her rushing towards him, stopped where he was standing, turned excitedly and barked nervously. A sign to hurry up. When Marie reached him, he ran back into the woods, turning around again and again to signal her to follow him quickly. Marie ran back and forth through the thicket, after the excited Hermes.
When she finally got to the other end of a nearly impenetrable wall of holly and sapling fir trees, utterly scratched, she saw Hermes leaping and yelping on a seemingly lifeless body. He licked and punched the unresisting human beneath him and turned to Marie with concern.
There was no time to lose. Marie shook the man lying in front of her and tried to find his pulse and breathing. She lifted his torso and tapped his lungs and heart. Marie finally made out a tiny movement and a weak pulse.
"Hermes! Get Rose! Hurry up!” she shouted into Hermes' eyes with full confidence in his understanding and Hermes ran.
"Hey, wake up! What happened?” Marie was desperate, but tried to stay calm and hoped that Rose would appear soon. She repeatedly patted the man's face, back, chest and arms, trying to wake him up.
There! Suddenly she heard a low groan and increased her efforts.
"You, wake up! I'm with them!” She opened his eyelids and called into the wide open pupils. "Man, come back! Come to me. I'm here!"
Finally! A little blink. "Oh, thank God!" Marie cried out relieved and she dragged the unconscious man to the nearby birch tree, sat him upright on her trunk and held him so that he didn't fall over.
Suddenly the man's eyes opened and he looked directly into Marie's water-blue iris and into the infinite width of her pupils, smiled and greeted Marie politely with a quiet and weak "Good morning!" and immediately fainted again.
"Yes, good morning to you too!" Marie greeted back and spoke to herself because her counterpart could no longer hear her. "Yes, why not? Lying around here half dead in the forest, but greet politely. Apparently there must be so much time. Again, that can only happen to me."
Finally she heard hurrying footsteps and rustling in the background. Hermes was back and with him came Rose.
Rose practiced examining the man and examining the immediate area. Where Hermes and Marie found the man, they discovered two bottles of Whysky and an empty glass that said "Veronol". She ran back and slapped him hard in the face. He woke up again. With an uncanny speed and force that Marie found inexplicable, Rose grabbed the man, yanked him to his knees, tangled her left hand in his hair, jerked his head up, and put two fingers of her right hand in his mouth. She yelled at him and at Marie too. "Shout Marie, kick him, bite him. He mustn't go back to sleep.” Marie did as she was told and hit the already limp body, which she felt sorry for in her heart, but the need was great.
He finally threw up profusely, but Rose persisted, sticking her fingers in his mouth over and over again, forcing him to drink water and repeating the somewhat brutal procedure of making him vomit again.
It was already afternoon when Rose's look, her facial expressions and her actions showed that the greatest danger was over. She sank exhausted into the grass and laid the poor creature's head protectively in her lap. Marie would have liked to do something for Rose, but she too was completely exhausted and sat back to back with Rose. At least that way they could support each other.
Rose gratefully dropped her head on Marie's shoulder and breathed a sigh of relief. "I think we've made it for now, Marie. Rest a little and then run to Jacob and ask him to come and help us. I can no longer carry it home.”
“I'll do it!” panted Marie, “I'll start right away. Just a couple of minutes."
Rose groped backwards for Marie's hand, found it and squeezed it tightly. "You did well, Marie! I'm so proud of you. There really is a healer in you.”
Of a night that was even darker
as their undisputed essence
Rose and Marie kept vigil by the bedside of the unfortunate. Rose was worried and watched the man's violent spasms at irregular intervals. Every time they suddenly visited him, the bed started to vibrate with him. The whole room seemed spellbound as if in a maelstrom. He bucked, trembled and groaned, and then fell into a cationic rigidity. Rose kept saying, "There's something wrong." She anointed the poor man with oils of lavender, St. John's wort, and other herbs, and washed his sweaty body with herbal waters.
"What do you mean by that, Rose? What's wrong.“, asked Marie.
"Watch him, watch the room! How do you feel when he has these fits?” Rose Marie asked.
Marie investigated, thought. "I'm very worried then. I've never seen anything like this and I don't know what to do."
"What are you feeling?" Rose remained hairy.
"I always get very cold and I have a strange pressure and a strong stabbing pain in my stomach. I get goosebumps and it scares me.” Marie described her intuition.
"If it happens again, observe what you perceive before, during, and after. Write it down!” Rose instructed the worried-looking Marie.
And suddenly there was that strange coldness in the room again. Marie felt a kind of draft on her skin, the way you feel it when someone walks very close to you. The room was drenched in night around midnight, but suddenly it seemed to grow even darker. The candle began to flicker and as if by an invisible breath, it went out. At the same moment, the man's uncontrollable spasms began. He writhed, trembled, made terrible noises and groaned.
When he calmed down again, Rose left the room with the words. "Do everything as usual. I have to think."
Some time later she came back into the room wearing a coat and boots. "I have to ask someone for advice, Marie. It's urgent!"
"Rose, please don't go! I don't even know what to do if he's feeling so bad again." Marie pleaded.
Rose looked deep into Marie's fearful eyes and worried face. She lovingly caressed Marie's head and gave her, which she had never done before, a tender kiss on the forehead. "You can do it! Do everything you do here with all the strength of your heart. Cover the poor thing with your love. He needs her more than anything. I can't do more for him at the moment. I know you can do it! I will hurry. But I won't be here before noon tomorrow. I'm going to see Jacob now. He has to drive me into town. It is another journey.” With these words, with terrible worry and tears in her eyes, she left Marie alone with the convulsing and screaming man and hurried out into the night. Hermes wanted to go with her but Rose asked him to take care of Marie and the house.
The night was clear and the air, steeped in spring with new life and awakening, refreshed and cleared Rose's confused thoughts. 'Voodoo, black voodoo, this must be it. No damn it is. I have experienced these vibrations before, back in Nigeria. It felt the same and it was a similar presence. I have to question Erzulie.'
Rose had deliberately not told Marie about her suspicion. She didn't want to upset her any more. She said a few protective prayers and healing mantras for the two beings, which she had to leave unprotected in her house. Tears filled her eyes at the thought of the danger she was exposing Marie to. She paused, wanting to go back. “No, her heart is pure and full of love. Nothing will happen to her. She's only afraid of the responsibility and not of what actually threatens her and that's a good thing! I have to get help.” she spoke resolutely into the night. She felt that she was not alone. Something followed her and wasn't at all amused that Rose thwarted its plans and gave a "surefire thing" an unexpected turn. Rose paused again and felt that cold presence trying to get hold of her from far away and summon her. Rose breathed deeply, smiled and thought with purposeful concentration towards this presence: 'Well, I seem to be on the right track.' Not only did she seem to be thinking fast but also walking fast, because in the distance the night lantern and the smoking chimney of Jacob's house could be seen.
You know what...
Marie sat on the edge of the bed, cooling the forehead of the feverish man and humming softly to herself. She felt the hum calmed him down during his last fit. He seemed to sense it somehow and his spasms subsided faster than the previous times. Actually, she had only started to hum and sing softly because she was completely overwhelmed with the situation and didn't want to start crying.
'Strange,' she thought. 'Now he seems to be sleeping so peacefully and then he flares up like he's possessed by a demon.'
Marie watched his face, softly outlined against his sweat-soaked black hair in the candlelight. It was a beautiful face, perfectly symmetrical with charismatic masculine contours. However, the eyebrows, the slight curve of the cheekbones, his slender lips, which ended in an expressive chin with a small hollow in the middle, drew soft lines in this clear male face.
Marie straightened his pillow, touching his hair. It was very fine and yet formed a strong and luxuriant tuft. She didn't know why, but she suddenly felt an irresistible urge to smell it and very carefully bent over the sleeping man. She sniffed her hair and thought she caught a familiar scent. A smell she liked and she tried to remember where she knew it from. She slowly got up again.
"Finally," the man whispered and smiled into the soul of Marie, who rose from his hair and was slightly startled.
"Finally you're there. I've been looking for you everywhere and I missed you so much. Finally I see you again.“, the man whispered with bated breath.
"What do you mean? You must have dreamed. We do not even know eachother. My name is Marie."
"Hello Marie. Remember back then in Stonehaven? We promised each other that we would always love each other and that we would find each other again. And now we've found each other.” He breathed with apparently all his strength.
Marie was confused: "No, really we don't know each other. You must be mistaking me.”
But the man no longer spoke to her. He got restless again, turned his head and started talking in another language. This time it was a kind of English with a heavy accent. That night Marie had already heard Arabic, Spanish and a foreign language that she couldn't place. She anointed his arms and chest with the herbal oil and recited the OM MANI PADME HUM mantra she had learned from Rose in the ceremonies during the Rough Nights. She just couldn't do more, which drove her almost crazy. However, a protection and healing mantra could not hurt in any case.
So the night passed into a gray and foggy morning with far too long hours. Marie was dead tired and punished herself with reproaches because she had already fallen asleep twice. She quietly slipped out of the room to brew herself some strong coffee and tend to the dogs and cats.
Marie warmed her stiff and cold fingers on the gas burner and put the kettle on. She decided to walk up and down the garden a little to breathe some strength into herself in the freshness of the morning. That felt good, but when the kettle began to whistle softly, she hurried into the kitchen. She didn't want to wake up the sleeping man at any cost. Between the spasms and hallucinations, his sleep had become sacred to her, because she, too, could only relax again when he fell into him. Everything in between was pure mental torture and cruelty for the delicate Marie. She hated seeing him suffer like that. Although the intervals between his fits finally lengthened toward morning, every minute she watched his sleep she feared his awakening.
She poured herself some coffee, quickly ate a piece of dry bread and hurried back to the sickroom. The man slept very peacefully and so Marie tried to relax in the comfortable armchair that was her sentry post, thinking about Rose and hoping that she would come back soon.
Marie woke up with a gentle shaking of her shoulders and before she opened her eyes she recognized the good rose from her bright and warming aura.
Startled and guilty, she jerked to her feet. "Oh no, I fell asleep" and looked over at the hospital bed with a sorrowful look.
Rose put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "It's all good, Marie. Thanks for keeping watch here. You must be very tired and should sleep now. But before that, I want to introduce you to someone else. Come into the kitchen with me.”
Coming out of the kitchen, Marie felt a strange commotion, a loud and sonorous voice and from time to time a trembling laugh. Marie was now used to something softer from Rose and these vibrations, which were very present in the house, intimidated her a little. So she walked slowly behind Rose, seeking protection, but was still curious as to what awaited her in the kitchen.
"Oh no, what a lovely thing. So you are little Hexe Marie. Rose, oh god she's cute! Come here Marie, come into Mama Mambo's arms!"
Mama Mambo thundered towards the intimidated Marie, who was still hiding behind Rose. But no chance, Mama Mambo didn't wait until Marie came to her in her arms, but came over herself and buried Marie in her lush breasts and under her strong arms.
"Oh, such a pure heart. You can hear the angels singing.” She took Marie's confused little head in her hands, which was high time for Marie due to the acute lack of air, spoke strange words in a foreign language and blessed Marie. Still gasping for air, Marie thanked Mambo politely and also greeted the laughing Jacob, who seemed to have enjoyed the scene.
"So, tell Marie. how was night Mama Mambo telling exactly what happened to man. But first Erzulie goes to see if he's still alive." Rose and Mama Mambo left the kitchen. Marie looked questioningly at Jacob and snorted.
"Who, who is that?" Marie asked Jacob, who was still smiling.
“This is Mama Mambo or Erzulie. She is a very experienced voodoo priestess. She is from Haiti.”
Marie felt it thunder through her intestines and almost hysterically, her eyes wide open, she just managed to say "Voodooooo... what's that about???!!!".
Jacob stayed calm, sat down at the table and poured himself a cup of coffee. "Come, sit down with me Marie. You don't know much about voodoo, do you?"
Marie sat down next to Jacob, looking for help. "It's black magic, isn't it?"
Jacob put an arm around Marie protectively. "No, that is not true. You probably only know such horror stories of dolls and needles, curses, blood and dead chickens. That's not the truth about voodoo. This culture is believed to be over 12,000 years old and lived by the Yorubas, an African tribe who served the ancient pharaohs of Egypt. These people left Egypt and migrated as far south as Southwest Africa to what is now Benin and Nigeria. The Yoruba worshiped nature and Voodoo is actually nothing more than an ancient African culture, religion and healing art. Mambos, as Mama Mambo calls herself, are priestesses who understand the art of healing. An essential part of this healing art is also the trance work. Mama Mambo works in trances with Erzulie, a goddess or as they are called in voodoo Loa. She drives into them and helps Mama Mambo to recognize and heal diseases. But they work with herbs and subtle energies just like Rose and you. I'm sure Rose and Mama Mambo can tell you a lot more about that later."
"Yes, but that's not true at all with the dolls and curses. Is that similar to how people in this country are afraid of witches?”
“But Marie, there is always the other side of white. A very special and responsible part of the work of Mambos is the exorcism and curing of the inscribed people. You must know that there are also priests who work black magic. As far as I know they are called Bocor. Traditionally, they are usually united in secret societies and such a black magic curse is actually only discussed in the union and hits criminals, rapists, murderers and thieves. It's a very responsible decision. Because what harms one can be healing for others and vice versa. It may be difficult for us in Western cultures to understand something like this, although the atrocities committed in our cultures were and are no less brutal. Think of Jesus alone. We resist Satan and let him do it through our actions. That's not much better either.
In voodoo, as in all cultures, there are also black sheep who practice black magic and emit curses. They usually get paid well for this kind of work, and that's definitely not in the spirit of voodoo. And then of course there are also simply evil characters who do such things out of hate, envy, jealousy or resentment and usually with a good portion of stupidity and naivety. But you know how it is Marie. Something like this always comes back to you quickly and, as is well known, the seed is always smaller than the result. But first, have a coffee with me. Mama Mambo will surely tell you everything. Just keep an open mind and don't be afraid. I'm sure you can learn a lot from her”, Jacob said and a confused little Marie sank into the back of her chair a little more calmly and completely exhausted.
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Darius sat at the bedside of a patient he already knew well. Herr Herrmann had often been his patient. He used to be a doctor, too, and when he wasn't claiming that the entire staff, the ward, actually the entire clinic was under his control and insulted Darius as a "greenhorn", he really liked talking to him. "Herrkatze" as he was affectionately called by the nursing staff, had a lot to tell in lucid moments.
According to Hermanchen, medicine used to be much better off. It was simply about people and less about money and profitability. You could still be proud of your job and you weren't a medically trained accountant like most of today's colleagues. He also had a lot of knowledge about medicinal plants and told Darius about spectacular life-saving measures with very simple means in the war and post-war period. You had nothing there. He, that is Darius, had no idea about that anyway. He was probably born wearing rubber gloves, Herrmann suspected.
A nurse came in to bring Herr Herrmann the midday medicine. "Oh, the doctor is here, so he can give you the medication," she whispered and hurried to close the door from the outside. Understandably so, because Mr. Male was not at all interested in taking his medication and it was always a tedious task to convince him to do so.
Darius took the pot with the medication and Herr Herrmann's hand. The old doctor just about put up with that from a doctor. After all, Doctor Schön had a bit of an idea.
During the conversation, Darius noticed that Mr. Herrmann was trembling. In previous stays, when excited, he certainly had a slight tremor, but this tremor was constant and recent. So Darius held Herrmann's hand with one hand and a glass of water with the other. Five pills lay in his trembling hand. Darius knew one thing for sure. He had prescribed only four.
“Wait a minute Mr. Herrmann, I think something is wrong. I'll check that once and be right back."
Darius took the pills from his trembling hand and went to the nurses with them.
"Sabine, would you please show me Herr Herrmann's medication plan?"
"Yes, of couse. Why is something wrong?” Sister Sabine asked.
"It's one too many and I want to check that out," Darius replied gruffly.
Sabine dutifully and at the same time guiltily took Mr. Herrmann's file out of the tab.
Darius found the documentation of the medication prescribed with his signature, but something had been added to the last line of the table, Oxacytan, 3 times a day, 100 mg.
"What's that?" Darius wanted to know.
"I have no idea, you must know that?" Sabine answered nervously.
"I want to see the complete list of medications my patients have been given in the last 4 weeks, today!" Darius ordered and angrily left the medication room.
"Yeah, that's fine, I'll finish it." Sabine called after him, confused. Darius came back in a rage and asked for the pack of the suspect drug Oxacytan. Sabine handed him a white blank box with a sticker that only gave the name and the 100 mg specification of the drug.
Nothing was found about the drug in question, neither in the DAB nor in other lists. Then an idea came to him. The argument with his boss before his vacation was triggered by two newly introduced drugs from Morck Pharma & Chemical. He picked up the phone and dialed the number for the company representative from his business card case.
He was lucky the other end picked up, just imagine a lady by the name of Gruber, Mr. Felix Todewald was on the business card.
Ms. Gruber introduced herself in detail and explained that she had recently taken over Mr. Todewald's duties because he had left the company very suddenly.
Darius tried to gain Ms. Gruber's trust in small talk and mentioned the word oxacytan between long working hours and his favorite meal. Ms. Gruber was suddenly in a hurry and had to go to an appointment. "No, she doesn't know the drug."
He called colleagues and various institutions, but no one knew about Oxacytan. Then there was a knock on his door and Sabine came in with the requested medication plans.
Darius couldn't believe his eyes. Six of his twelve patients had the drug on their schedule in different doses. Without exception, exactly these six patients had severe clinical pictures with pronounced symptoms without a clear state of consciousness, psychoses and schizophrenia.
Darius opened the window. He thought he was suffocating in this room, he would have liked to run out. But there was another knock on his door.
"Wait a minute!" he called to the knocker, hurried to the sink, opened the cold water tap and washed his face and sweaty neck. He went to the door and opened it. His boss, who seemed to be in a good mood, stood in front of him and smiled at him. "What are you doing in there. do you meditate?”
Darius looked him seriously in the eyes: "No. I made a phone call. Please come in."
"It's good that you're back Darius. Working with patients is no longer for me. I'm just too old for this fool's theater. But hopefully I represented you sufficiently during the visits. you look good boy You seem to have recovered well. I wanted to clarify a few things with you. Do you have time for me?"
"Yes, I have time for you and I would also like to clarify a few things with you. First of all, what is Oxacytan?” Darius threw the fake pack at him. Professor Graetzler took the package in his hand and looked nervously for suitable words to explain. "Oh nothing more. Just a little study. You don't need to worry about that. It's in my hands," he hastily trivialized.
"I'll take care of that very well, since six of my patients take this drug every day and I didn't prescribe it. OK, one more time. What is Oxacytan and why are my patients taking this drug?”
"My dear, I'm still in charge here and as I said. It's not important,” Professor Graetzler tried to assert himself.
WHAT IS OXACYTANE?” Darius yelled at his superior and jumped off his chair.
"I think you should have stayed away a week longer. You're still so excited. Does the work overwhelm you?” he tried to unsettle Darius.
"Now you're going to tell me what kind of medicine that is! Otherwise you explain it to the clinic management and the public prosecutor's office," Darius decided to go all out.
Professor Graetzler's face and neck suddenly turned red and his carotid artery visibly began to pulsate.
"Darius, it's a good drug. What are you so upset about? It is about to be patented. I have taken on the responsible task of trying small tests in vitro. There is no danger at all. Patients react little or not at all.”
"You're using my patients as guinea pigs for an unpatented drug?" Darius stood stunned in front of his boss, the man he had always trusted, who helped him get this job and advised him. "You are done!"
Professor Graetzler now also stood up. "Remember my dear, the files have your signatures on them, not mine." and grinned hostilely.
"Yes, dear, but not on my account, but on yours, there are probably dubious payments from sub-accounts that can be traced back to the Morck company. How much did they pay you for it?” Darius replied with a unerring look directly into the pupils of his counterpart and shook his head in bewilderment.
Graetzler left the office with the words: "I would be careful if I were you!"
There was no time to lose. Darius knew that drug companies were not to be trifled with. He hastily searched the cupboards for the documents and files that before his vacation had struck him as suspicious and that he thought had been tampered with. Then he discovered a strange object in one of the hanging cupboards. It was a small plaque of metal with strange symbols carved into it. He picked up the small tablet and looked at it. Suddenly the characters blurred before his eyes, he felt a dull ache in his head and he became dizzy. He put the board in his trouser pocket, grabbed everything he considered important, files, the manipulated medication schedule, the white box and Mr. Herrmann's pills, and hurried to the nearest police station. "I want to file a complaint for abuse of office, document forgery and bribery."